reprogramming

The past week or so has been a little rough on all of us. First of all, Jalen is growing like crazy. He's bulging out of all his new clothing. We've been trying to regulate his eating habits by spacing out his feedings, while giving him more to eat at each sitting. His two teeth are totally out now and he's chewing anything that he can wrap his little fingers around. We've started to introduce him to cereal, which he seems to enjoy, but more for its novelty. Milk will remain his main source of nutrition until he's one but now is the time to start him on solid food. He's getting bottle-fed more often because, much to his dismay, we've been weaning him off the breast a little. We've also elected to start him on a modified cry-it-out sleep training (more on this later). Next, we will probably get him to roll over and bark at will. All this stress has made him a little more subdued recently and as you can see, we've broken him down good.

dear jalen

I remember when you were just a little strobe light on a computer screen. I was informed that this was your beating heart. I remember it to be the loudest blinking light that I have ever seen. You were a 9-week embryo then and though I could not touch, see or smell you, you were more real than anything I've encountered in my life. 32 weeks later you came into this world and no one could have altered my reality like you have. For you, I've had to fight through a lot of travail, but it's been worth every stinking minute and more. I've got Jalen tattooed on my heart and Father's Day will bring a different sentiment from now on. I honestly never knew fatherhood could feel like this. Thank you.

bit by bit

Jalen is teething big time. Aside from some mild crankiness, he's taking it like a good sport. Poor kid, it's not just one tooth coming out, but two! Sooner than later, he's going to start taking in solids. It's scary how quickly he's growing up but he's becoming more and more fun as he does.

in the buff

I snapped at Eumi recently about some stupid things. I realized that I was a little stressed out over what to do about Jalen's sleep training. I had no idea that I would feel so vulnerable to something that's supposed to benefit Jalen and us. It's not that I'm opposed to letting the kid cry. But how do we know we're not doing him wrong. I can easily apologize to Eumi for being a jerk but how do I confess to a baby? I would feel so guilty. How does the saying go--hurts me more than him? I'm learning that trying to decide what's best for your child can make you feel a little naked. Judging by the look on Jalen's face, he's going to get me back for deciding on this one. But look at those thighs!

mommy birthday

Eumi's first birthday as a mother. No better present than love and laughs from her baby boy.

rain dancing

"looking at jalen SSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOO makes me smile." That was all that was said in an email we received. That is my new mantra, it's my less obvious reality. That is my new idiom, it means I can't wait to get home to my baby. According to my almanac, our harvest will be strong for a long, long time.

sleep: the rough cut

To cry or not to cry? This is the question that Eumi and I harp on constantly. Every child reaches an age where a sleeping routine must be instituted. You must direct children to nap and sleep at exact times every day. You must direct them to be independent so that they can soothe themselves to sleep. This will create great existential harmony in a baby. But the path to sheep-counting nirvana belies a bit of pain and suffering.
This is all thanks to Dr. Emmett Holt who created the "Cry It Out" (CIO) sleep method way back in 1894. This method entails putting the baby down at sleep time and not returning to the room until sleep time is over, even if your baby just spit up his/her lungs.
Dr. Richard Ferber released a book in 1985 teaching a modified CIO method, which is the approach most widely practiced today. "Ferberization" involves creating a bedtime routine followed by intervals of CIO that increase over time. In this method, if you see your child's lungs on the bed, you may intervene.
Attachment parenting practitioners scoff at the idea of allowing your baby to CIO, their logic being that it's cruel and insensitive. They feel that it's unnatural to raise a baby from books.
Unfortunately, I'm looking for a bit of resolve. Consciously governing Jalen to cry (or not) is the first hard decision we'll have to make. I have yet to release the final cut.